Before I truly begin here, let me explain the photo: someone decided that she no longer smiled in photos unless she was posing with a "favorite" friend. I'm the mom; not a friend. (Apparently, she gets my parenting style). My kid can be such a delight and joy, and then there is this... I'm so looking forward to the teenage years with this one.
"Life's a Dance" was the theme of our June recital this year - all of the songs had something to do with life events and milestones. There was prom, sleepovers, bath time, loss, heartbreak, engagement...etc...It was an extremely creative program with wonderful choreography and song choices. Having just watched the videos of the day, I can once again say how proud I am to be a part of such a dynamic dance family at Synergy, full of caring teachers and students.
But dance actually isn't what this post is about, exactly.
I find myself at a crossroad. Professionally, I could not be more excited to develop my consulting and marketing business plans because I do see it as the next logical step in my career. So here, I see the direction in which I need to travel and intend to do so confidently. But personally, I'm standing at this intersection waiting for a signal change and the light is still red.
Actually, there is a traffic signal like this in Newton, NJ, right by the County Seat restaurant. To cross from the side of the highway where you park to the restaurant, you must cross over Route 206 except the walk signal doesn't seem to ever allow a person to actually walk. Traffic will have the red light, but the actual walk signal never seems to change. I've stood there waiting and waiting until I finally realized, I needed to just walk (quickly) and hope I don't get run over by a turning vehicle. Oh how symbolic!
And I am also reminded of a Sesame Street episode where Big Bird is learning about traffic signals. When the signal tells him to "walk," he enters the cross walk, but mid-way through his travels, the signal changes to "don't walk." Big Bird stands in the middle of the intersection, obeying the signs until someone explains what he should do, i.e.: not stand in the middle of the road. For whatever reason, I always remembered this Sesame Street episode. Maybe because it was a little funny or maybe because it was a bit anxiety producing. "Come on Big Bird, get out of the road!"
There's a great new song out by a group that I enjoy called Pepper. I was a fan of Sublime in my college years. A few years ago, I was reminiscing about the music of the good old mid-1990's and in exploring "similar music" to Sublime and The Beastie Boys on Pandora, I discovered Pepper and The Dirty Heads as well as some others (Slightly Stoopid, Rebelution, etc...).
The song is called "The Invite" and the lyrics talk about being "stuck in indecision" and "taking action."
"Welcome to your life, where you can live if you want to.
Welcome to your life, cause right now your life is more than just being alive."
So standing at my personal intersection, I've been singing the lyrics over to myself: "Take action, make it happen. What are you waiting for? Too much talking, too much knocking. Just kick down the f*&#ing door. Make a move, roll the dice. Make a move, it'll be all right."
I tend to be a risk taker in a lot of respects. I'm not a skiing from helicopters in Colorado or jumping from airplanes risk taker, but I do take a lot of chances, some more thought out than others. But, I've been standing here at this intersection for quite some time. The direction I should head based on the signs is apparent. There's an arrow and everything. It's just that easy.
Here's the thing: if I obeyed the traffic signal by the County Seat, I would never get across the street to eat their delicious lamb. If I read the signs literally like Big Bird, I'd be standing in the middle of the road flapping my wings, still not enjoying delicious lamb shanks. Carpe diem, right?
Life is a dance and sometimes the simplest song and choreography create the most beautiful and memorable performance. When the message is clear, it is universally accepted. The signs I am reading in some respects could not be more clear and at the same time, they are so complicated.
Ever try to read a parking or no parking sign in New York City? Seems straight forward until you get to the third sign on the pole - wait, so I can park here if I put money in the meter but only between the hours of 2am and 5 am and only on alternate Wednesdays when the weather is clear and the wind is out of the Northeast, but there's parking only on alternate sides? Complicated. Matters of the heart are like that.
I'm not a wait for things to happen person; I'm a make it happen person. I'm impossibly impatient. I've always been that way, except I find myself wavering between waiting for the walk signal and just taking the first step in the direction of the lamb shanks. When I weigh my options, so many factors jump onto the scale pushing me back onto the curb every time.
So this is where I am. Eventually, someone in Newton will fix that signal. Eventually, I'll be able to walk when it's safe. I'll push the button, read the sign and walk. Although the lamb shanks are delicious, I'm not so sure they are worth getting hit by a truck.
"Life is a dance: you learn as you go." Like Big Bird, I'm still learning. And when I get where I'm going, I'll definitely smile for the photo.